The elegant desk Fandango....
Today I have been subjected to the greatest demonstration of non-logic ever witnessed by man. What could I possibly be warbling on about? Well…apparently the plan to rearrange my office has been in the pipeline for some time and that was fine, as long as it was ‘in the pipeline’ it was never going to offend my already offensive working day. But it would seem that the voice of command decided today, a Friday, would be a good day to do it.
Now the day in itself poses an array of issues. It’s Friday and this is a garage, Friday is not a quiet clock-watching day for us. It’s a busy day filled with irate people wanting their cars back and non stop phone calls from people who just want us to ‘have a look’ at their car but mainly we just can’t be arsed to be even slightly productive.
So, the move around.
In principle it’s a wise idea, creating more space and therefore allowing us to be a bit more organised. Sadly it didn’t work like that. Prior to today, I was quite happy where I was, sitting at the back hiding from customers behind my unnecessarily flash TFT monitor. From my original position I could be left to get on with my work in a relatively undisturbed way choosing to stare at the Artex for great periods of time or sneakily evade my computers weak firewall and go on eBay. It was good, my skiving helped me pad out the day so that I was never put in a position where I might actually have to FIND something to do, and considering I only do about 45 minutes of real work every day a lot of Artex has come under my close scrutiny. Finding work isn’t an activity I like to take part in, although having said that I’m not great fan of work. Period. I’m sure your beginning to understand my dismay by now, while my job isn’t the best in the world you can’t escape that, from a skiving point of view, it’s top notch.
That was then, as for now…well.
The front counter where we serve people (or make then cry when issued with £3k bills for a £1k car) is my new home. My desk, in all of its faux wood splendour has been hoofed up to said counter, which is black. That alone makes it look shabby, the whole thing looks like a child built it with left over wood from a tree house. Also this puts me on the front line, I’m going to have to work damn hard to get the punters to believe I’m doing something and not just ignoring them. They can see my screen now, so my ‘hit random keys: look busy’ trick is dead. They’ll now know that nothing more than JUQWRB QOWUBV WOB QWJB is being aimlessly typed in. I’m actually going to have to converse with them before I actually need to, if only to tell them to go away. When they queue up in the morning to bring us their cars they are like sheep, but now they’ll be like sheep confronted be fresh grass. They’ll be annoyingly captivated by whatever I’m doing, and I don’t like that.
The previous position of my desk was bad as I’m right next to the MD, but thanks to being moved forward the MD can see everything on my screen. So daytime eBay is dead. And on that note so is Artex spotting, because he’ll see the angle of my head tilt up, followed by a glazing over of my eyes. I can’t escape the fact that I’m no in a position where I might, possibly, maybe have to do something productive during the day.
Anyway, I have to go now as my lunch is over. I figure if I move my desk by about 1mm a day I’ll end up back where I started and no one will notice. It could take some time though.
Right then, where’s my tape measure and my calender….
Now the day in itself poses an array of issues. It’s Friday and this is a garage, Friday is not a quiet clock-watching day for us. It’s a busy day filled with irate people wanting their cars back and non stop phone calls from people who just want us to ‘have a look’ at their car but mainly we just can’t be arsed to be even slightly productive.
So, the move around.
In principle it’s a wise idea, creating more space and therefore allowing us to be a bit more organised. Sadly it didn’t work like that. Prior to today, I was quite happy where I was, sitting at the back hiding from customers behind my unnecessarily flash TFT monitor. From my original position I could be left to get on with my work in a relatively undisturbed way choosing to stare at the Artex for great periods of time or sneakily evade my computers weak firewall and go on eBay. It was good, my skiving helped me pad out the day so that I was never put in a position where I might actually have to FIND something to do, and considering I only do about 45 minutes of real work every day a lot of Artex has come under my close scrutiny. Finding work isn’t an activity I like to take part in, although having said that I’m not great fan of work. Period. I’m sure your beginning to understand my dismay by now, while my job isn’t the best in the world you can’t escape that, from a skiving point of view, it’s top notch.
That was then, as for now…well.
The front counter where we serve people (or make then cry when issued with £3k bills for a £1k car) is my new home. My desk, in all of its faux wood splendour has been hoofed up to said counter, which is black. That alone makes it look shabby, the whole thing looks like a child built it with left over wood from a tree house. Also this puts me on the front line, I’m going to have to work damn hard to get the punters to believe I’m doing something and not just ignoring them. They can see my screen now, so my ‘hit random keys: look busy’ trick is dead. They’ll now know that nothing more than JUQWRB QOWUBV WOB QWJB is being aimlessly typed in. I’m actually going to have to converse with them before I actually need to, if only to tell them to go away. When they queue up in the morning to bring us their cars they are like sheep, but now they’ll be like sheep confronted be fresh grass. They’ll be annoyingly captivated by whatever I’m doing, and I don’t like that.
The previous position of my desk was bad as I’m right next to the MD, but thanks to being moved forward the MD can see everything on my screen. So daytime eBay is dead. And on that note so is Artex spotting, because he’ll see the angle of my head tilt up, followed by a glazing over of my eyes. I can’t escape the fact that I’m no in a position where I might, possibly, maybe have to do something productive during the day.
Anyway, I have to go now as my lunch is over. I figure if I move my desk by about 1mm a day I’ll end up back where I started and no one will notice. It could take some time though.
Right then, where’s my tape measure and my calender….
posted by Chris at 4:36 AM
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